Mirroring oneanother

Who would you rather be with and mirroring oneanother? 

Your best friend who loves pizza as much as you do, who's crazy about basketball like you are, who watches the same programs on TV as you; or your next-door neighbor who's a vegetarian, hates sports, and watches those shows that will bore you to dreamland?

The answer is obvious. You would want to be around people who have the same behaviors, attitudes, and values as yours.

Birds of the same feather flock together.

Mirroring oneanotherBookworms like each other's company because they share a common bond - their love for books. Basketball fanatics flock together because they can RELATE to each other's interests and ideas.

If you really want someone to like and trust you, you've got to exhibit the same qualities as that person. And theres no better way to do this than by using body language. Heres how it goes:

Match their facial expressions, gestures, posture, speech, styles, actions, breathing patterns, values and beliefs. Put yourself in their shoes. In other words, BE THEM.

By doing this, you are also matching their way of thinking. You may easily adapt to their inner thoughts and views.

You may also do some crossover matching. For example, you talk at the same rate as their breathing. Or you can scratch your chin every time their eyes  blink. Get the idea?   

Be genuinely interested and curious with everything you can find out about them. Discover their attitude. Know their life story.

This is what we call mirroring oneanother.

But mirroring should not be confused with mimicry. You should act with courtesy and caution. Never let the person you're mirroring be aware of what you're doing. Just imagine acting out shamelessly what the other person is doing. Every time he stands, you stand. When he scratches his head, you also scratch your head. That would be insulting. Never let the person you´re mirroring oneanother have any chance to think that you are mocking him.

Your main objective should be to influence the subconscious. Even if a person is not aware that you're mirroring him, his subconscious mind realizes it.

The person will subconsciously be at ease when you duplicate his manners indirectly. He will feel very comfortable if you're both on the same level.

  • Correspond with Their Moods
    Correspond with Their Moods If a person youre mirroring have lots of problems, don't come to him in a joyous mood and say, "Don't worry about it. Let's watch a movie so that you'll forget about...

  • Developing Rapport
    Developing Rapport The ultimate goal of mirroring is to build rapport. It's the time when you and the people youre mirroring feel so close and in synch with each other that you feel like you've known...



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Understanding Body Language of Action Oriented People
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Interpreting Body Language Signs When They Are Suspecting Or Doubting You
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Interpreting Body Language
Mirroring oneanother
Correspond with Their Moods
Developing Rapport
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Personal Space in Negotiations
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Understanding Body Language in Selling
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Interpreting Body Language in Meetings
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